Do you have a mirror?

I was reading a blog the other day when I came to a post quoting a part of Milan Kundera’s Immortality:

"Just imagine living in a world without mirrors. You'd dream about your face and imagine it as an outer reflection of what is inside you. And then, when you reached forty, someone put a mirror before you for the first time in your life. Imagine your fright! You'd see the face of a stranger. And you'd know quite clearly what you are unable to grasp: your face is not you."

It reminded me of a chat I had with a very good friend of mine sometime ago. Somehow we came to a point where I started retelling a part of a movie called The Never Ending Story, which is actually one of my favorites. I won't go through the overall story of this movie, just bits that are relevant here. however if you haven’t seen the movie, I'd suggest you try it).

Anyway, in a part of the movie the here who is a little boy named Atreyu and who is on a mission to find a way to fight The Nothing and save Fantasia, has to pass through two gates to reach the Southern Oracles. Here are parts of the script from his talks with Engywook, who is a scientist and acclaimed expert in Southern Oracles:

Atreyu (looking at the Sphinxes): Is that the Southern Oracle?

Engywook: No, it's the first of the two gates you must pass through before you reach the Southern Oracle, and get me the final information for my book! Of course, most people don't get that far...

Atreyu: Why?

Engywook: The Sphinxes eyes stay closed, until someone who does not feel his own worth tries to pass by.

So the first gate is a really though task, Atreyu watches the lost attempt of a knight who tries to pass through, but is instantly burnt by flashes from Sphinxes eyes. But since he is determined to carry out his mission, gathers all his confidence and courage and manages to pass.

But the really interesting part comes next, which is more relevant to the point I'm trying to make. After Atreyu passes through the first gate, Engywook comes back to Falcor (the luck dragon) to give him the news:

Falcor: I knew he would be safe.

Engywook: none sense, you don't understand anything. The worst one is coming up; next is the magic mirror gate. Atreyu has to face his true self.

Falcor: So what? That won't be too hard for him.

Engywook: Oh, that's what everyone thinks. But kind people find that they are cruel, brave men discover that they are really cowards; confronted with their true selves, most men run away screaming….

I won't say what happens next, not to spoil it for those of you who may like to go and see the movie.

Now why did I bring this up, especially after that quote from Milan Kundra? What interests me most in both of them is their reference to a magic mirror, the one that would have shown you your true self, the one that if revealed, people would have run away from it screaming. References to this mirror are replete in the literature. There is The Picture of Dorian Gray by Oscar Wilde that doesn't directly refer to a magic mirror, but tells the same story that the picture of one's true self could be monstrous. And many more.

I believe that is something worth reminding ourselves of. We are inclined to create a nice and beautiful mental image of ourselves, and shove all the dirtiness and cruelty under the rug. May be you say your mental image of yourself is not that nice and beautiful, but that doesn't change a thing, as long as you are not having an image close to the reality of your true self. It may seem easy in the beginning but is one of the greatest challenges of life I believe, and I dare say it could be one of the keys to happiness and spiritual prosperity.

Anyway, why was I telling all this to my friend? I wanted to reveal yet another revelation of mine; that I believe among different things that could help you find your true self is a good friend who could act as the magic mirror. A good friend would get close enough to your inner self and reflect your goods and bads as they are, revealing all the things that you are trying to suppress with the help of your mental image. As all the great assets in the world are, true friends are rare, hard to find and even harder to keep. If you have one, count your blessings.